MANILA– You ask the same questions, cry for the same reason and possibly cursed the person to death. You join the growing outrage of #WalangForever movement. You used Basha’s lines in One More Chance or Mace’s in That Thing Called Tadhana in attempt to understand your situation. Yes, breakups are devastating and you just won your membership back in The Singles Club! We all went through it.
But as days, weeks or months pass, it will finally hit you that you had enough of the dramas and began to realise that you deserve a better path to take. Fortunately there are signs that you are finally letting go the ‘heavy load.’
One: You no longer associate the person with practically anything under the sun
We all went through that pang-pelikula scene when we overheard mother Whitney Houston’s Where Do Broken Hearts Go. The striking jolt when you saw somebody wear his/her style. Your “violent” reaction when you pass the street food stand you and your ex used to eat.
But as time goes by, you slowly get sick of the kwek-kwek drama and sad love songs. You’d rather listen to beach party playlists or simply don’t bother to remember your ex’s face when eating that orange quail egg. Good or bad image.
Not that I’m saying you’re nagmama-asim or bitter, it will just hit you in the face to not associate the person on scenes that you see everyday.
“We can’t laugh at the same joke again and again but why do you keep crying over the same thing again and again?”
Two: You can laugh at your own story
Do you remember the stressful days when you had your first break-up and how you managed to overcome it? You consult your friends, family members and on a level of desperation— strangers. Sharing the story over and over again may have helped you overcome the drama. The “I gave up everything for him!” or “She had me at my best but she chose to break my heart” are just few of the lines that we used to gain social support from our loved ones. Time finally come that you share the story without remembering the emotion and you even find it funny.
When you share it without shedding a tear or changing your positive mood, you are indeed moving on. Venting out problems is a helpful way to ease an aching heart and laughing at your previous acts is a sign that you are now looking at it on a more positive perspective.
Three: You’re done asking questions
You understand that life isn’t all about answers to every questions. There will always be words left to be unsaid, questions unanswered and ‘what-ifs?’ You accept that sometimes, silence can be an answer to a hundred of lingering questions. The other person stopped loving you, and you embrace the fact that he/she is now gone—that’s it! No more questions or what-ifs. You realise that the relationship HAPPENED for a reason, and nothing is ever wasted in life.
Four: You no longer think about it
You go out and do something you enjoy, like a hobby you have always loved, whether it’s hiking, travelling with friends, biking, running etc. You are now focused on the activity and the joy that it brings you. Though there will be times that you’ll still think about your ex (it’s a force in the universe that we can’t stop), you know to yourself that it won’t last long or affect your positive mood. You just slaaaaaay the day ahead!
Five: You believe in yourself again
When my ex suddenly abandon me, I honestly felt ugly and worthless. Crying over and over again, I doubt myself that I would be able to overcome the situation. I was frightened that I wouldn’t be able to rebuild myself again. But those were the days.
One fateful day you also realised that this is not the path that you deserve, that the world is faithfully waiting for you to get on your feet again. You rebuild your confidence by looking at your capabilities that you thought you lost during the low-times. You now pay attention on how you react to things, understanding the root of your insecurities, and taking steps to address your fears.
It’s just PAG-IBIG (Love), most of us went through it. You are now focused on reflecting to life and goals, eventually that extra scoop of love will come again in the MOST mysterious and unprecedented ways.
So here’s Channing Tatum to cheer you up.
You’re welcome. #MagicMike
*GIFs are downloaded from Google Images